Despite all of our best intentions to avoid the pitfalls of the season – stress, over indulgence, loneliness, anger – we may end up failing.
What do we do then? When everything feels like it has fallen apart and we are such a mess?
Bring it back to self – Be Response Able
“If your house is on fire, the most urgent thing to do is to go back and try to put out the fire, not to run after the person you believe to be the arsonist…. so when you are angry if you continue to interact or argue with the other person, if you try to punish her, you are acting exactly like someone who runs after the arsonist while everything goes up in flames.” Thich Nhat Hanh
The first step is to take responsibility for your own feelings instead of blaming someone or something else.
We avoid doing this because we are afraid and don’t want to feel bad. So, it is important that you are able to support yourself with compassion and kindness at these challenging times.
Bring it back to self – Self Compassion helps…
Most of us feel compassion when someone we care about is struggling but we can be very harsh and judgemental with ourselves which only makes a difficult situation worse.
Self compassion is an act of courage that stands up to harm, including the hurt that we inflict on ourselves through self-criticism / isolation / rumination when we are ‘not getting it right’. This attitude helps us to take responsibility for our feelings, admit our mistakes, forgive ourselves and move on.
Guided Self Compassion Practice helps you to support yourself
Click below to access a guided Self Compassion Break to help you support yourself when challenged.
Bring it back to self – remember EVERYONE makes mistakes, everyone fails sometimes…
And a poem from John O’Donohue to gladen your heart and hold you in a warm embrace…
Beannacht – “A New Year Blessing”
On the day when
The weight deadens
On your shoulders
And you stumble,
May the clay dance
To balance you.
And when your eyes
Freeze behind
The grey window
And the ghost of loss
Gets into you,
May a flock of colours,
Indigo, red, green
And azure blue,
Come to awaken in you
A meadow of delight.
When the canvas frays
In the currach of thought
And a stain of ocean
Blackens beneath you,
May there come across the waters
A path of yellow moonlight
To bring you safely home.
May the nourishment of the earth be yours,
May the clarity of light be yours,
May the fluency of the ocean be yours,
May the protection of the ancestors be yours.
And so may a slow
Wind work these words
Of love around you,
An invisible cloak
To mind your life.
Until tomorrow… be kind…go gently…
This blog was written by Joanne O’Malley, Mindfulness at Work.
We offer Workplace Mindfulness Training that transforms peoples’ work and their lives.
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